The facets of Submission: Part 2
I follow very few Dom blogs. Simply because like I have said I identify with submissive and am far more interested in what they have to say. Not only this but having a loooong term partner (going on 10 years) I am completely uninterested in finding any kind of “hook up” and therefore I only follow those whom I respect, or have something interesting or unique to say. Or if I suspect that they are genuinely nice folk. In following a few of them I have seen variations on these asks a whole bunch of times:
“How do you punish naughty girls?” “I need you to punish me please?” “I have been a bad girl please punish me.”
Now let’s put aside the obvious flaw in their plan, which is that they are topping and there is no faster way to tick off a good Dom than that, but they also seem to be immensely eager to be punished. This maybe something to do with the shades of grey novels leading girls to believe that punishment involves having sex toys inside you while being spanked or being forced to go out in public with no underwear. These are not punishments these are fun things for everyone to enjoy, commonly known as tasks or tests. Let’s see how far up the glass stairs my girl will walk without her underwear on, let’s see how much spanking I can administer to her before she struggles. See? Fun!!
This leads me to my issue. I’m going to call this section…
In a scene one might enjoy the act of role-playing as a naughty school girl or a prisoner being interrogated, a femme fatale needing subdued, or a servant girl caught stealing and needing to be punished in all sorts of playful, painful, kinky and fun ways. Who wouldn’t like this kind of fantasy with just enough pain and rough treatment to make it real?
Even outside of a scene a girl might enjoy rough and passionate sex where her Dom doesn’t think twice about causing her some discomfort within the realms of safety and her own limits. Maybe she likes the hair pulling and the spanking and the humiliation.
The one thing she should not enjoy however is punishment.
I am speaking to both the Dom and the sub here. Regardless of any fetish or kink you have, and I’ll get to that later. Regardless of anything else, punishment is meant to correct unacceptable behaviour. The level of the infraction should be equal to the level of the punishment but under no circumstances does a submissive want to be punished. Not in reality, not in light of the fact that punishment means she has failed, or angered her Sir.
The idea of making him unhappy, of being a bad girl, of being less than what he knows you can be, of letting him and yourself down. That should be completely abhorrent to a sub. It should make her angry at herself. If she doesn’t believe she warrants punishment for her actions she should not only be able to plead her case, she should be encouraged. She should be able to trust him enough to know if she is right he is a big enough man to admit it to her and to himself.
If you are in need of correction he will administer it and you will remember next time that this was NOT a fun experience for you.
It’s just so incredibly tedious to hear girls talking about one thing (punishment) when they mean another (playtime/kinky games).
A subs nature comes from a genuine desire to please. Not necessarily through altruistic reasons, which I will also get to later, because her desire to please is not a selfless one. It is something else entirely. Regardless of this she does have this desire and when she fails it is truly upsetting and the consequences are genuinely distressing. A sub doesn’t want to incur the wrath of her Sir and he does not want his girl to randomly disobey for the fun of it. It’s disrespectful and shows a lack of partnership and trust in the relationship. He most certainly does NOT want to punish her. He wants to control her. He wants her to want to obey. (I can’t speak to why, that will take a Dom’s perspective)
And the bottom line is… she should want to obey. Period.
As ever this is MY perspective. I have taken my experiences, readings, interactions, conversations, friend’s stories and many other resources to form an opinion. A subject like this can never be described by fact, only by subjective analysis and this is what I have done. I hope that it speaks to even one person.
© Ellie Prose
back to tumblr.
Cause Daddy said last night” u need to write every single sentence that comes to ur slutty mind, cuz time changes us every second. u need to write when u feel this feelings, when u feel the inspiration about each fucking.”
So I’m here.
Hi again to all of my precious followers.Have a sexy day :)
my pussy got what she deserved, can u switch to my ass, Mister?
Uzan bakalım fahişe, şimdi kıçını hazırlayacağız.
What a fucking great night.
Thank God, for the chocolate highway!